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Although I was painfully shy for most of my childhood (and again for a couple dark years of my adult life), I normally try to be a fairly outgoing guy. Not “in your face with a ton to say within five seconds of meeting you” outgoing, but I don’t usually have a problem saying hello to a stranger (even though I’m terrible at small talk). If you’ve ever read any tips on how to be more outgoing, one thing that you’ll always find is stressed is that you should smile more. As strange as it sounds, I think I might need some work in this area.

Obviously I know how to smile, and thanks to three years of braces and otherwise thorough oral hygiene practices, there’s nothing about my smile that I think is embarrassing. The problem for me is protocol for smiling at strangers - I don’t feel like I have a good smile without showing my teeth, but if I’m full-on cheesing it for no reason, I think it might make me look like a Joker-esque sociopath.

So, how to find a happy medium? I’m not sure. I think I’m likely to creep some people out if I am practicing various fractional levels of smiling to see what kind of reaction I get. I guess the other option is to not smile at anyone, but that makes me seem like a jerk. Although I think my girlfriend might prefer that option, since I pretty much only smile at strangers if they have a vagina. It’s not a flirty thing, since I will smile just as much at some 80 yr old lady buying groceries as I will at a cute 21 yr old who is trying to get by me in a crowded bar. Okay, maybe not just as much, but it’s pretty close. Or maybe I’m just over-analyzing this, as I’ve been known to do with some things, and no one is even paying attention to me.

If nothing else, I know what face not to make. Ever, under any circumstances.